SFL notes

Chapter 11: Self and Social Understanding
Perspective taking: Selman’s five-stage sequence
Level 0 undifferentiated perspective taking (3-6)
Dad want’s this teddy bear for Christmas, teddy bear makes me happy it must make dad happy too
Level 1 social-informational perspective taking (4-9)
You like baseball because you play baseball, but I like soccer because I play soccer
Level 2 self-reflective perspective taking (7-12)
Step into another person’s shoes- you are sad when I laugh at you and I should stop
Level 3 third-party perspective taking (10-15)
When Caleb and I fight it hurt our mother’s feelings
Level 4 Societal perspective taking (14- adult)
Understanding that slavery hurt the slaves (not present during slavery though)
Characteristics of friendships for children (type of play not amount that changes over time)
Preschool: increasingly self-aware, engage in joint, interactive play
Middle childhood: introduction that others have different perspective than their own
Rough-and-tumble: friendly chasing and play-fighting
Wrestling with dad
Dominance hierarchy: level to the group members; predicts who will win
Dad is going to win the fight
Adolescence social interactions increase into peer interactions
Like soccer interact with the soccer team (learned from rough-and-tumble hierarchic players)
Damon’s stage sequence of friendship
Functional play: simple repetitive motor movements rolling same car back and forth
Constructive play: creating or constructing something (3-6) making a road for the car to go on
Make-believe play: acting out everyday/imaginary roles (2-6) our cars are race cars going down this track
Games with rules: following the rules of the game our cars can only go when I say go
Social competence; know definition given in class and examples of socially competent behaviors
Social problem solving skills applied strategies that prevent or resolve disagreements
Teaching these skills: peer relations
Knowledge of social rules
Representations of past social experiences
Social expectations
Effects and benefits of possessing these skills
Better grades in school
Chapter 12: Moral Development (page 509-517)
Instrumental vs. hostile
Instrumental/Proactive aggression: children act to fulfill a need or desire (head but another child to get a toy)
Decreases in preschool as children learn delayed gratification
Hostile/Reactive aggression: angry, meaningful hurt another person (hit brother with hammer)
Rises in verbal form as age increases
Relational vs. Overt aggression
Overt/Physical aggression; harms others through physical injury; punching
Noticeably more often in boys, yet controlled (it is a crime to murder)
Verbal aggression: harms others through threats; name calling, teasing
Relational aggression: harms others through peer relationships; you cannot come to my birthday party
Noticeably more often in girls; at age two
General characteristics of aggressive children
Direct: hitting; I won’t be your friend
Indirect: destroying property; spreading a rumor
Chapter 14: The Family
Parenting
Authoritarian: low acceptance and involvement, high in coercive control, low in autonomy granting
Psychological control: behaviors that manipulate attachment to parents
spanking
Permissive: warm and accepting but uninvolved with little control
You can go to that sleepover with no parents even though you are five
Uninvolved:… duh
Authoritative: the ideal parent with autonomy granting
Over solicitous: over protective parenting
Oh! Let me do that for you
Sibling interaction
Siblings who are close in age: relate to one another on a more equal footing than parents and children
Caleb and I growing up together; strong emotional connections
Family/parental factors predict positive sibling interaction
Good marriage is linked to preschool siblings’ capacity to cope adaptively with jealousy and conflict
“mom! He needs you,” development of understanding of other’s needs
Family
Size now vs. 1960s
3.1 in 1960
1.8 in 2000s
Outcomes for children of never-married parents
10% of American children 8% of Canadian live with a single parent who has never married w/o partner
85-90% are mothers
10-15% fathers
Engage in crime, experience homelessness
Spousal support needed in dual-income families
Father’s willingness to share child-care responsibilities is a crucial factor
Divorce
Approximate proportion of marriages ending up in divorce
45% in America
30% in Canada
Major change without both parents
Experience single parent homes
2/3 marry again and experience remarriage
Proportion of children living in a single-parent household- 1/3 of childhood with single parent
Consequences of joint custody
Tend to be better adjusted due to parents fighting less, although creates high stress levels when changing
Parenting characteristics of fathers who only occasionally see their children after divorce
Are less likely to pay child support
Blending or Reconstituted family
What is it: parent, stepparent, and children from different previous marriages form
60% of divorced parents remarry a few years latter
What are certain problems associated with these
Boys tend to adjust quickly to stepfather who is warm, but refrain from exerting authority too quickly
Girls: react with sulking and resistant behavior (father just took away best friend-mom)
Impact of emotional and physical child abuse
Central nervous system damage, and abnormal brain waves
Attempts to suicide
Chapter 15: Peers, Media and Schooling
Peers
Levels of social play
Nonsocial activity: unoccupied, onlooker on own playing blocks
Parallel play: plays near other children with similar materials two children play with blocks
Associative play: separate activates but comment/share divided blocks into colors for A and B
Cooperative play: play together with a common goal We will build the biggest block tower
Sociodramatic play: support each other’s pretend feelings block tower A is evil king B is good king
Make believe play
Act out and respond to one another’s pretend feelings;
explore/gain control of fear arousing experiences; enables self-regulation
Doctor:
Search for monsters in magical forest
Resolve disputes through compromises
You be the king, no I want to be the prince you can be the king, I will be the king this time you next
Be able to identify
Solitary-passive withdrawal
Reticence
Solitary-active withdrawal
What the peer group provides versus what friends provide
Peer groups: cooperation, leadership, followership, and collectivism
Friendship: development of trust sensitivity, intimacy
Peer acceptance (characteristics and outcomes) liability of child from group of age-mates as a accepted playmate
Goniometric techniques: self-reports researchers use to measure social preferences
Example: Nominate several classmates they like or dislike
Popular children: many positive votes
Pro social: combine academic and social competence
Neglected children: seldom mentioned
Well-adjusted, not less socially skilled, want to play, but just break out of the side on own
Rejected-withdrawn: negative votes
smaller subgroup of socially awkward children; watch other children play oddly
Rejected-aggressive: many negative votes
Severe conduct problems high
Popular-antisocial children: emerges in late childhood and early adolescence
The tough boys: athletically skilled but poor students with little social skills with adults
Controversial children: large number of positive and negative votes
Queen bee of the playground; notorious for using relational aggression
Difference between a clique and a crowd and what function a clique serves
Clique: small group who are friends, resemble one another in family background, attitudes, values, and interests
Important for place to express emotions, ideas, and girl talk; movie nights
Crowd: several cliques with similar values from a larger more loosely organized
linked to self concepts; and placement of self into a system (were my values fit in world)
Dominance hierarchy: the popular, the jocks, the burnouts all resemble a placement in the society
Peer reinforcement: wear the right shoes, kissing up to the teacher, run on the track team builds up identity
Conformity: discourage antisocial acts; act towards desirable ends
Influence day to day choices: clothing, music, hair cut
Parents influence education plans, drug intake, moral standing
Media
Effects of television on children, children TV programs (e.g. example Sesame Street)
1 understand that television is describing something
2-3 bowl of popcorn in the television would spill if the television was tipped over
4 television is symbolic; but the cartoons were real people some were in the world
5 news is real, but not understand that they have a script; people live like they do in sesame street
7 unreality of TV is discovered
8 fail still to detect motives/consequences and judgment
Preschool and young elementary school children’s incomplete grasp of televised information and inability to critically evaluate it increase the chances that they will believe and imitate what they see; yet educational programs that have slow followable story plots are shown to increase literacy and math skills
Average time American children spend watching television each week is 24 hours
Effects of television in relation to violence, ethnic and gender stereotyping, and pro social behavior
violence increase the likelihood of hostile thoughts and emotional
All ages are susceptible
Lasting negative consequences: IQ, parent education, family income
Aggressive children have a great appetite for TV in general
Effects of heavy home internet use
High parent-child conflict; delinquency; internet use

Schooling
Benefits of small schools and classrooms
Scored higher in reading and math achievements each year
Greater likelihood or graduation from high school
Children and transitions within the school system
Kindergarten: with more preschool experience scored higher on positive attitude towards school
Transition to adolescence: grades decline; tighter academic standards, less personal attention/participation
Less favorable jr high experiences than in elementary school
Children with higher adjustment rates stabilized eventually
Children with low adjustment rates decreased steadily
Effects of special class placing versus mainstreaming
Homogeneous groups: single grade
Low-SES, minority, males are not social dumb because they can see…
Drill basic facts and skills
Engage in less discussion
Progress at a slower pace
Eventually view themselves as not being smart
Heterogeneity combining two or three adjacent grades into multi grade classrooms
More successful
Grouping in High School
Lower-level classes substantially put forth less effort because they are less stimulating
Inclusive classrooms: put children in mainstream to prepare them for the social real world
How the USA does in terms of cross-national academic achievement
Below average and just above low-performing nations
Cultural valuing of academic achievement: not valued
High-quality education for all: not work with students as much; low standards
More time devoted to instruction: all day in play, television, play time
Emphasis on effort: Americans focus on natural ability, not the effort put forth
Risks involved with adolescents who work more than 15 hours during high school
Peruse of spending money rather than saving money
Outcomes for high school graduates who do not go to college
20% are unemployed
Most are low-paid, unskilled jobs
Other readings
Differences of marital satisfaction
Planner (Let’s have a baby) small decrease through out pregnancy
Acceptance of fate (if we get pregnant we get pregnant) increase when pregnant, but equal to planner at 18 mon.
Ambivalent (We did not want to but we are) significant decrease
Yes/no (one wanted a baby, but the other did not) dramatic decrease
Transition to parenthood
Marital satisfaction before vs. after baby
Decrease in marital satisfaction
Marriage stressors after the birth of a child
Remedies to these stressors
Husband: understand that child birth is a surgery
6 weeks before healed
Hire a 2nd person to clean house
Set up dinners with the visiting teachers/family
Wife: Don’t critique
Give appreciation
Trust husband with the baby
This is not the time to fix all of those things you have been wanting him to do
Don’t ask for a new project
Division of household labors between husband and wire before and after the birth of a child
Realistically it is hard after having a baby
Financially: if mother had an income before it will not be there
No such thing as women’s work
Not 50/50 because face it the women is at home all day and the husband is at his job making $
Marital structure
Members
Roles
Responsibilities
Marriage = a presidency
Benefits of fathers who play with their children and who are involved with their children’s lives is massive
The family, a Proclamation to the world
Duties of a parent love and raise children in a loving home


Human Development (our course covers only from conception to parenting themselves
An interdisciplinary field of study devoted to understanding all changes that human beings experience throughout life span
To much stimulation for a baby
Spoil baby? Can not spoil an infant
Basic issues
Theory: orderly, integrated set of statements that describes, explains and predicts behavior
Continuous development: counting, adding, multiplying, dividing,
Discontinuous development: one night child goes to bed and does not know the next they do understand (has stages)
The individual: certain genetics stuck: stable, open to change
Children follow same development: head up, arms up, crawl, walk (all children: Asian, Peru, American)
Context: home school vs. public school
Nature vs. Nurture:
Nature: genetic, anything physiological
Nurture: environmental factor determine development
Historical foundation : effect how people treat children: children little adults- 1800s children spoiled- 2000

Language
Nativist perspective
Language Acquistion Devise: LAD, there is a switch in the brain that turns on at birth and off at puberty, and as long as you are around the language you have the ability to learn the language.
Behaviorist perspective: operant conditioning and imitation
Interactions perspective: brain and environment interaction
Prelinguistic development
1st speech: all speech sounds in variously languages
2nd joint attention: mom- “do you see that dog? Look,” mom- “do you see that balloon? Look,”
3rd phonology: sequences of sounds “TV” is “didi”
4th semantics: words/combinations have meaning (influenced by gender, cultural, ex.)
Referential style: label objects (boys) “I truck” about his toy truck
Expressive style: talk about feelings (girls) “She sad” about her little doll
Overextension: word applied to widely, anything with wheels is a car
Under extension: applied to narrow, believes that their teddy bear is the only real teddy bear
Word coinage/metaphors: stapler becomes “paper puncher together”
Fast mapping- taking a familiar word and applying it to the new experience
Last year remembered going sledding and saying wee, fast mapped word wee with snow
When saw the snow, “Now we can go weeing!”
Grammar:
context of sentence language “me hungry,” “you ball”
Over-regularization: regular grammar rule to exception “two lose tooths,” “runed”
Parent and child interaction:
Expansions: elaborate no utterance to increase complex: child- dink
Parent- would you like a drink in a cup
Recast: repeat word normally until child learns: child- dink
Parent- a drink
Progmatic development: appropriate communication with others, important to develop on receiving and giving perspectives
Turnabout: coments on what was said and replies with a question- dating
“what is your major” “elementary education; have you chosen a major yet?”
Shading: change of topec gradually by modifying focus
“I like basketball… I enjoy baseball more… there is a baseball field next to here… we should play baseball”
Illocutionary intent: beating around the bush/implying by the matched tone, facial, and wording
“the garbage smells,” means take out the garbage
Referential communication skills: verbally clear
Social cognition: self, other people, relationships
Self: soul, unique, worth “I am” humility comes from not thinking less of self but less about self
Young women theme: “I am…”
Goal in life: never forget who I am, discover divine and true self/worth, help others relize their worth
Emergence of self/development or of self-concept
Many adults are unable to recognize self because of abuse, retardation, or lack of concern for the self
“I” self: cognitive, recognition of personal actions/body/mind
Can not see self- and unable to realize self is real
We take children to a mirror and point at them and say, “look, who is that? Who is that?” because the child truly does not know that they have a physical body and it must be taught to the to recognize themselves
Awareness: individual who’s thought are not acceptable by others, children are out to believe that Santa knows what they are thinking because they believe that their thoughts are open to everyone including you, children need privacy sometimes so they make secret forts with signs that say “no parents allowed” to get it
Continuity: same in the morning and evening
Coherence: single body
Agency: control thoughts
Recognition: separate people, not the only one who feels this way, and yet my feelings are unique to me
“Me” self: reflective observer (schema of self) An attempt to answer the question of who I am
Self-concept: how Joy Prior views herself with the understanding of the “I” self or that she is an individual
Symbolic integrationists: though language/interaction with others I can imagine what people think of me
Generalized other (George Herbert Mead) what we imagine other people think of us
She did not call me so she must dislike me
Looking glass self (Charles Horton Cooley) the mirror is the social mirror around us
When I walk into the house and mom hugs me when I get home- I am huggable
social give off: simply the ones that we are given verbally, body language, facials
You are so pretty
Internal vies: the social interactions that we accept, not simply the ones that we are given
You are so pretty No, I am not that pretty. You are just saying that
So protective of ourself image that we are drawn to mirrors that reflect positive
- you are good at music to the five year old practicing cords
They say I am good at music I will add that to my “Me” self image
- you are talented at music to the twelve year old playing hymns at church
They say I am talented at music I will add that to my “Me” self image
- you are a person who truly enjoys music to the senior in high school playing the piano for the choir
They say I am person who truly enjoys music I will add that to my “Me” self image
- you are musical to the university student graduating in music
They say I am musical I will add that to my “Me” self image
-add clapping, concerts, the repeated positive social experiences connected with music and you have a musician
Wisdom in the mirror/who does the “I” self allow to define the “Me” self
Enemies: the devil
Friends: church leaders
Family: Mothers and Fathers
Heavenly Father, Holy Ghost, Jesus Christ are external mirrors
No matter what we have to develop yourself perspective from the surroundings; the “I” has the ability to actively chose the things that we surround ourselves with; chose truthful things to surround self with: God is all truth: God has the clearest picture of who the “Me” self is
Repentance
1st recognition of self: “I” did it
2nd sorrow: and it was bad
… reconstruct self image into one that is acceptable before GOD, not one that is acceptable before man
Most damming is to compare ourselves to others
Skills in basketball: the “I” self can make 5 three pointers out of 10
Compare self to John Stockton: 9 three pointers out of 10
He plays better than I do therefore I am bad at basketball
Compare self to 64-year-old-man: 0 three pointers out of 10
He plays worse than I do therefore I am good at basketball
THE “I” SELF DID NOT CHANGE IN SKILL LEVEL; THE “ME” SELF CHANGED OPINION OF THE “I”
There was no progression for the “I” self, and therefore comparisons are damming or stop progression
Hostile behaviors to feel ‘good” you must come out on the positive end of the comparison:
Insult, gossip, to make the “me” self perspective above another and the “I” self be better
Attitude to not help others out of fear that they will become better
Worth of the “I” self
Worth is determined by what someone else is willing to pay for it
Jesus Christ paid his life for Joy Marie Prior
God gave his only Begotten for Joy Marie Prior
Nothing we DO increases our worth
Ability to look at other people as the same worth
Ability to look at ourselves with the same worth not matter what we have done
Other people rely on Joy Marie Prior to develop their self perspective
I am a positive and truthful mirror for others to see their true self in
Children development of self
Self perceptions: competence in skill level
Self image: what you believe you are
I am a talented soccer player
2-4 years: me is developed on see, touch, smell, taste, hear- “I am a boy. I have a dog. I have a mom.”
4-7 years: perception of self- “I am a good jumper. I can count really high.” tend to be inaccurate and over exaggerated but very positive
Walk into a preschool and ask, “Who is the fastest runner here?”
Entire class, “I am!”
Have a race with all of the children and time them with a winner and loser
Ask again, “who is the fastest runner here?”
Entire class, “I am!”
Children with abusive parents: negative image developed by this point
Children with over protective parents: negative image developed by this point
8-12 years: domains become more abstract; “I am smart”
12 years and on
Self-worth: how valuable you believe you are is a very abstract idea and developed with cognitive
“I am bad at school, I am ugly, I am fat, and I suck at sports, but I am a good person so I am of worth.”
Multiple domain self image:
“I am outgoing when I am with my friends, but sometimes I feel shy and just walk to class
Theory (probably interaction of the ideas)
A: good performance results in self esteem that self is of high worth
Has high eating disorders, suicidal thoughts
B: self esteem that self is of high worth results in good performance
More stable self-esteem
C: good performance in area that is important results in self esteem that self is of high worth (William James)
I am good at soccer and I am on the team and I like being on the team, but I suck at math who needs math anyway

Pre-conventional level: moral understanding; important to understand WHY people make the choices to be “good”
Justification/rationalization: knows the principle but misses the faith in the principle or action
Stage Description reasoning Pay tithing because…
Base: focused on self
Stage 1 punishment and obedience fear of the punishment I pay because it is the rule
Stage 2 Instrumental purpose satisfy a self need I need the blessings
Conventional Level: proper social order
Stage 3 seek for approval from others maintain social image I will have to tell the bishop at the end
Stage 4 maintain social order guidelines for society I pay to contribute to temple
Post-conventional level: abstract set principles
Stage 5 social-contract reasoning behind actions I pay tithing to help build God’s kingdom
(understanding of rule)
Stage 6 self chosen ethical pattern principle applied I pay because I want to give all back to God
(no need for rule) A law about tithing? Only 10% what? I give all I can?

Moral domain (Elliot Turiel) morals are sectioned into domains to protect welfare/rights of others
Problem with this theory is that there is ample gray matter such as gay marriage, abortions, modesty
Moral imperatives domain: Protect welfare and rights of others
Killing someone
Social conventional domain: set by the society we live in but truly not harmful
Belching: context A it is rude context B it is a complement
Matters of personal choice domain: what we have as personal ideas
If my bed room is dirty it does not affect anyone else
Needs a key understanding of were people have placed the issue and why abortion disturbs some and does not phase others
Example:
Teenager: room clean is a PERSONAL domain
Parents: room clean is a MORAL domain
Visiting cousins: room clean is a SOCIAL domain

Distribution of Justice: how to divided wealth
Ask children to divided a pizza
Socialism: 8 children; pizza becomes 8 even slices despite age, weight, or appetite
Democratic: 8 children; pizza becomes 8 slices based on a voted need bases
Republic: 8 children; pizza becomes 8 slices based on the labor given for that pizza
Dictator: 8 children; pizza is given to the biggest child who takes it
Self-control: resistance to temptation
Compliance: voluntary obedience to request/command
Wear modest clothing on Brigham Young University campus because I willing signed honor code
Delay of gratification:
Clarify with child that if they do not eat marshmallow while you are gone when you get back they can have two more
Child weighs if the instant gratification is worth more than the reward
Moral self-regulating: monitor one’s own self conduct
Go to bed early when I am not at my parent’s house but in my apartment

Emotions: are believed to be inborn even according to behaviorists
Professor screamed in the middle of class and established a level of fear
Description of fear
Heart beat quickens, blood rushes, eyes widen, neck muscles intense,
There is the need of a physical body to experience the emotion of fear fully!
Physical reactions occur in the body during emotions: flight=fear fight=anger
It was not until men might be that men are that they might have joy
Adam feel to enable the emotion of joy
They might have is an implication that there was no emotion prior to the fall because no one had it
Satan is in a state of misery and he does not have a body
Wants a body so badly! That he would get inside a snake and tempt eve, or climb inside a pig, and even get into the hearts of men to experience emotions. He does not have his own body though, and can not experience these emotions himself
Job: the angles shouted for Joy not with joy
Besides job was not a real story most scholars believe that job was a descriptive parable
Important to note though that it was for or the shouting was at joy the emotion
Instead of with joy the emotion
The plan of salvation is also called the great plan of happiness
Christ’s Atonement was based on the laws of mercy and justice and he had to come to earth to fulfill it, because it could not be fulfilled if he was in heaven; We came to earth to have a body, but why did we need a body? So that we could be perfect like God what is it that a body gives us that we could not have before, power to procreate. If Jesus Christ was already a God who was perfect why did he need a body to fulfill his mission?
Law of justice requires emotions
Agency
Obey - action - disobey
Blessing -reward- punishment
Joy -emotion- misery
Law of Mercy
Sin (debt)
If will to pay for our debts If will to pay Christ’s set debts
Christ Us
If able, is able because If able, we are able
Savior: called broken heart
Sinless: no debts himself contrite spirit
Son of God: divine heritage
Forgiveness/laws of justice fulfilled
On earth we even label irrational actions, imagine if in the pre-mortal world there was emotions involved for this eternal choice
It was in the heat of the emotion
It was an emotional choice
If Emotions are like physical reflexes
Orphans in Rowena have reflexes to someone entering a room is to stair into space
Orphans in Rowena scream when they climb into the bathtub because it is fearful; touch, water, bearskin
Primary emotions are evoked by an event or a response
Scream-fear
Drop-fear
Love is not a primary emotion because you learn to love and it is not a reaction to an event, but a conscious choice; which makes the contrast between love and lust (stimulated raw emotion) that much greater
Commanded to put of the natural man, because the natural man is an enemy to God
the natural man or our earthly ‘tendencies’
The Almighty created our spirits
bodies came from our mother, and father who are in a fallen state
physical imperfections
Nature argument
when God is saying to put off the natural man is he talking about putting off your runny nose, lip walk, or diabetic physical deformities, no he is talking about our wicked tendencies, which must have been something that is consequential of our fallen state: not being in his presence and our physical fallen bodies
Emotional self-regulation
Some people have bodies that help control emotion better
Go to a scary movie, some walk out with the same heart beat, others walk out physical with an increased heart beat; it was the same move, but a physically different reaction
Receive a fullness of Joy when we are resorted with our bodies are reunited with our spirits!
Unable to have the emotion of joy without a physical body